What are some good work jokes?

The best funny work jokes are about things everyone shares: meetings, email, the printer, Mondays. For example: “Why is the conference room always so cold? Too many drafts.” All 150 on this page are written to be safe for a mixed room.

What is a good dad joke for work?

Try “Why don't calendars ever get promoted? Their days are numbered,” or “Why did the rubber band get put in charge of the budget? It knew how to stretch it.” Dad jokes work at the office because the groan is the point.

What are clean jokes for work?

Clean, funny workplace jokes are about objects, routines or yourself, never about a person, a group or anyone's looks. Skip drinking, politics and anything that needs a warning. If you would not say it to a new client, leave it out.

How do you tell a joke in a meeting?

Tell it in the first minute while people join, pause before the punchline and move on right after. One joke is plenty, and a joke about the meeting's own topic lands best.

How do I start a joke of the day at work?

Pick a channel and a time, post the setup and add the punchline in the thread a few minutes later. Rotate who posts each week. If jokes run out, our fun fact Friday page has a daily fact to post instead.

Are jokes appropriate at work?

Kind ones are. Shared laughter makes a team easier to work with, as long as nobody is the target. Skip jokes after bad news, in tense conversations and about anyone's background.

Can a professional teach our team to be funnier?

Yes. In our hosted Improv session, a live host spends an hour on thinking on your feet, on Zoom by default or Teams, Google Meet or Webex on request. Book about 2 weeks ahead.

150 work jokes, clean enough for any meeting

Dad jokes, meeting jokes and presentation one-liners, each with a Copy button. Nobody in the room is ever the punchline.

KraftyLab TeamUpdated Oct 202610 min read

These 150 work jokes are written for a room full of coworkers: dad jokes for work, office and meeting jokes, email and spreadsheet humor, kind jokes about jobs, Monday and remote work jokes, one-liners for a presentation, knock-knocks and holiday jokes. The joke always lands on a stapler, a calendar or a Monday, never on a person, so every one is safe to post in a team channel. Tap Copy next to any joke to paste it into Slack, Teams or a slide.

25 dad jokes for work

Groan-worthy on purpose. The office supplies are the stars, so nobody in the room is the punchline.

1
Why don't calendars ever get promoted? Their days are numbered.
2
Why did the pencil get a promotion? It always got to the point.
3
Why did the scarecrow win the team award? He was outstanding in his field.
4
What did the stapler say to the stack of paper? “I'm really attached to you.”
5
Why did the coffee file a complaint? It got mugged every morning.
6
Why was the office clock so tired on Friday? It had been working around the clock.
7
Why did the office plant win employee of the month? It really grew on people.
8
Why did the whiteboard ask for a vacation? It was completely wiped out.
9
Why are scissors never late for work? They know all the shortcuts.
10
Why do office chairs never panic? They just roll with it.
11
Why was the office computer always cold? It kept leaving its Windows open.
12
Why is the calculator everyone's favorite coworker? You can always count on it.
13
Why did the laptop yawn through the meeting? It was ready for sleep mode.
14
Why did the banana get invited to every team lunch? It got along with the whole bunch.
15
Why don't eggs tell jokes in the break room? They'd crack each other up.
16
Why did the cookie visit HR? It was feeling crummy.
17
How did the desk lamp feel after its performance review? Delighted.
18
Why didn't the paper company hire me? They said my résumé was tearable.
19
Why did the tape measure get a raise? It always went the extra inch.
20
Why don't keyboards ever get tired? They work two shifts.
21
Why did the highlighter get the corner office? It always stood out.
22
What did the envelope say to the stamp? “Stick with me and we'll go places.”
23
Why did the rubber band get put in charge of the budget? It knew how to stretch it.
24
What does a computer snack on at the office party? Microchips, one byte at a time.
25
Why don't paper airplanes get promoted? They keep flying under the radar.

20 office and meeting jokes

Shared office life: agendas, thermostats, the printer and the fridge on a Friday afternoon.

26
Why is the conference room always so cold? Too many drafts.
27
What do you call a meeting with free snacks? Well attended.
28
Why does the agenda always look so sad? Nobody ever sticks to it.
29
Why do meetings never get lost? They always circle back.
30
What's the most popular workout at the office? Running late, then jumping to conclusions.
31
Why did the team bring a ladder to the meeting? Someone said it was a high-level discussion.
32
What do you call two coworkers arguing over the thermostat? A heated debate.
33
Why did the coffee pot get promoted? It kept the whole office running.
34
Why did the printer go quiet after the meeting? It was trying to toner it down.
35
What's rarer than a meeting that starts on time? One that ends early.
36
Why did the elevator win a team award? It never let anyone down.
37
Why did the stapler skip the 3 p.m. meeting? It had a pressing engagement.
38
Why does the sticky note get invited to every meeting? It sticks to the point.
39
Why are our team meetings like good movies? Every one of them gets a sequel.
40
Why did the new hire bring a pillow to the strategy meeting? She heard we'd be talking long term.
41
Why did the project manager bring a map to the kickoff? Someone said we'd be going over the roadmap.
42
What did the projector say when nobody could get it to work? “I just need a moment to reflect.”
43
Why does the open-plan office feel so relaxed? Nobody has any walls up.
44
Why did the meeting room look so exhausted? It had been booked solid all week.
45
What's the loudest sound in a quiet office? A bag of chips opening during a call.

15 email and spreadsheet jokes

For anyone who has ever hit reply all or chased a broken formula.

46
Why did the email feel so heavy? It was carrying too many attachments.
47
What do you call an email with no subject line? A mystery novel.
48
What's the scariest button in the office? Reply all.
49
Why was the spreadsheet so calm before the deadline? It had everything sorted.
50
Why did the spreadsheet get dizzy? It had a circular reference.
51
Why did the email go back to school? It wanted to work on its subject.
52
Why is the pivot table so good at problem solving? It can look at anything from a new angle.
53
How did the two spreadsheet cells settle their argument? They agreed to merge.
54
What do you call a spreadsheet that tells jokes? A fun-ction.
55
Why does the pie chart get invited to every meeting? Everyone wants a slice.
56
“Per my last email” is the politest way anyone has ever found to sigh in writing.
57
What's the fastest thing in the world? Spotting a typo right after you hit send.
58
Why are spreadsheets terrible at hide-and-seek? Anyone can find them with Control+F.
59
My inbox and I have a deal: it keeps filling up, and I keep acting surprised.
60
I sorted my email by priority. Now I have one folder, and it's called “Later.”

20 kind jokes about jobs

One for each profession. Unlike most jokes on jobs, each one is a compliment in disguise.

61
Why are accountants so calm? They always keep things in balance.
62
Why are bakers so good under pressure? They always rise to the occasion.
63
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to class? Her students were so bright.
64
Why did the chef win an award for creativity? He was a real whisk-taker.
65
Why do librarians always seem so prepared? They have everything checked out.
66
Why do electricians always know the news first? They stay current.
67
Why are gardeners such good mentors? They help everyone around them grow.
68
Why are pilots great in meetings? They always know how to land a point.
69
Why did the mail carrier get promoted? She always delivered.
70
Why do developers keep the lights off? Light attracts bugs.
71
Why are photographers so upbeat? They always focus on the bright side.
72
Why are firefighters great at office parties? They keep things from getting too heated.
73
Why are nurses so good at their jobs? They have a lot of patients.
74
Why do baristas give such good speeches? They know how to espresso themselves.
75
Why are mechanics such calm coworkers? They know when to take a brake.
76
Why did the astronaut skip the team lunch? She needed some space.
77
Why do carpenters never miss a deadline? They always nail it.
78
Why are drummers always on time? They never miss a beat.
79
Why are data analysts so relaxed? They know it all averages out.
80
Why are recruiters so good at puzzles? They always find the right fit.

15 Monday and Friday jokes

For the start of the week, the end of it and the long stretch in between.

81
Why doesn't Monday have more friends? It always shows up too early.
82
What did Friday say to Monday? “You're the reason everyone likes me.”
83
Why do Fridays feel so short? They're halfway out the door by lunch.
84
What's the best thing about Monday? It only happens once a week.
85
My coffee and I have a Monday morning agreement: neither of us talks until it's finished.
86
Why did the Monday meeting start late? Even the clock hit snooze.
87
Why does Friday never get stressed? It knows the weekend has its back.
88
What's Monday's favorite coffee order? A double shot of “here we go again.”
89
Why is Thursday always a little jealous? Friday gets the credit for all its hard work.
90
Why did Monday apply for a new job? It wanted to be a weekend.
91
What's the longest hour of the week? Friday, 4 to 5 p.m.
92
What did Sunday night say to Monday morning? “You're up.”
93
Why is Monday's to-do list always so long? Friday afternoon wrote it.
94
Why do weekends go by so fast? Monday is always waiting at the finish line.
95
What did the weekend say to Friday at 5 p.m.? “I'll take it from here.”

15 remote work jokes

Jokes about working from home: mute buttons, frozen screens and the coworkers who share your home.

96
What's the most common sentence in remote work? “I think you're on mute.”
97
Why did the Wi-Fi apologize to the team? It hadn't been feeling very connected.
98
My commute is now twelve steps, and I still manage to be late.
99
Who attends more meetings than anyone on a remote team? The cat walking across the keyboard.
100
My new coworker never takes my snacks, never talks over me and laughs at none of my jokes. It's my houseplant.
101
Why did the video call freeze right before the presentation? It got cold feet.
102
What's the remote work dress code? Business from the shoulders up.
103
Working from home is great, except one coworker keeps eating all my snacks. It's me.
104
Why did the virtual background look so nervous? It had a lot to hide.
105
Why do remote workers have such unusual comic timing? Every punchline has a two-second delay.
106
My dog has started joining our stand-ups. His updates are short: “Walk?”
107
Why did the headset get invited to every meeting? It was a great listener.
108
Why did the screen share make everyone gasp? It showed all 47 open tabs.
109
Why are remote teams so good at hide-and-seek? Half of them already have their cameras off.
110
What did the laptop say after eight hours of video calls? “I need to unplug.”

15 one-liners to open a presentation

Self-deprecating and short, so the laugh is on you and the room relaxes.

111
If this presentation goes well, I wrote it. If not, it was a team effort.
112
I'll keep this brief. That's not a promise, it's a goal.
113
There will be a short quiz at the end. Just kidding. Mostly.
114
Thanks for coming. I know there were snacks in the other room, so this means a lot.
115
Before we start, please silence your phones, or at least pick a ringtone we'd all enjoy.
116
I have 20 slides and 15 minutes, so let's find out how fast I can talk.
117
Questions are welcome at the end. Answers depend on how hard the questions are.
118
This talk has three parts: the part I practiced, the part I didn't and the questions.
119
Fun fact: this is the first slide. It only gets more exciting from here.
120
I practiced this so many times that my dog can now give the presentation for me.
121
I was told to start with something that grabs your attention, so: the budget.
122
If I look at my notes, it's because I'm pacing myself, not because I forgot what comes next.
123
I was going to start with a joke, but the numbers on slide 3 are funnier.
124
Let's get started while the coffee is still working.
125
I'm told attention spans are getting shorter, so let's begin. Where was I?

10 knock-knock jokes for the office

Best told out loud, with someone willing to say “Who's there?”

126
Knock, knock. Who's there? Iva. Iva who? Iva quick question about the new expense report.
127
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, we're late for stand-up.
128
Knock, knock. Who's there? Wanda. Wanda who? Wanda grab lunch after this meeting?
129
Knock, knock. Who's there? Arthur. Arthur who? Arthur any more questions before we wrap up?
130
Knock, knock. Who's there? Justin. Justin who? Justin time for the 9 a.m. meeting.
131
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut forget to submit your timesheet.
132
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ken. Ken who? Ken you hear me now? I think I was on mute.
133
Knock, knock. Who's there? Juno. Juno who? Juno where the good stapler went?
134
Knock, knock. Who's there? Annie. Annie who? Annie-one seen my coffee mug?
135
Knock, knock. Who's there? The interrupting coworker. The interrupting cowor… Sorry, quick question. Do you have a minute?

15 holiday jokes for work

Halloween to New Year's, plus a few for the long weekends.

136
Why don't ghosts make good presenters? You can see right through their slides.
137
Why did the vampire get promoted? He was the best on the night shift.
138
What's a witch's favorite office tool? Spell-check.
139
Why do mummies make great meeting hosts? They know how to wrap things up.
140
Why did the turkey skip dessert at the office potluck? It was already stuffed.
141
Why don't turkeys run meetings? They gobble up all the time.
142
Why would Santa make a great project manager? He makes a list and checks it twice.
143
Why did the snowman get the promotion? He always kept his cool.
144
Why did the office holiday tree get a new role? It was ready to branch out.
145
Why is the Secret Santa organizer so good at the job? They keep everything under wraps.
146
My New Year's resolution was to answer emails faster. I'll get back to you on how it's going.
147
How does Santa's workshop sort its mailing list? In elf-abetical order.
148
Why do fireworks get invited to every team event? They always have a blast.
149
What's every employee's favorite kind of labor? Labor Day.
150
Why does the Monday status meeting feel like Groundhog Day? Same time, same place, same “still working on it.”

How to use a joke at work

A work joke has one job: to make the next minute easier. Three places it does that well.

As a meeting opener

Tell it in the first minute, while people are still joining. It fills the wait and nobody has to be first to speak.
Pick a joke about the meeting's own topic: an email joke before a process review, a Monday joke on a Monday.
Say the setup, pause for a beat, then the punchline. A groan counts as a win.
Then move straight on. One joke is an icebreaker; three is a stand-up set.

As a joke of the day in Slack or Teams

Make a channel or pick a regular time, like 9:30 every weekday, so people know when to look.
Post the setup first and the punchline as a reply in the thread a few minutes later. People guess in the meantime.
Rotate who posts each week. Writing one of your own counts double.
Keep a reaction poll on Fridays for the week's best groan.

To open a presentation

Use a one-liner about yourself or the talk, never about the audience.
Put it before your first slide, not on it, so it sounds spoken, not scripted.
If nobody laughs, smile and say “That one tested better in rehearsal.” That line gets the laugh instead.
Keep it under ten seconds, then start the real opening.

Want a question instead of a punchline? Our 160 funny icebreaker questions get everyone talking, and the 120 riddles for adults give a joke-of-the-day channel something to solve. For a daily post that teaches something, try fun fact Friday.

When not to tell a joke at work

Timing matters more than the joke. Hold it when any of these is true.

After bad news, a layoff or a loss. Read the room before the agenda.
When someone is upset or a conversation has turned tense. Humor there feels like brushing it off.
In a first message to a client or a senior leader you have never met, unless they joked first.
About a coworker, even a kind joke, unless they are in on it and fine with it.
About age, looks, accents, religion, politics or anyone's background. Those are never work jokes.
When the joke needs an explanation. Save it for friends who share the reference.

Humor travels further in writing than you expect, so the same rules hold for an auto-reply. Our funny out of office messages stay professional, and our April Fools pranks for work are harmless ones that nobody has to clean up.